Addicted to Jesus

brooke: have you talked to the jesus guy?

melanie: oh, not yet

brooke: he's probs busy with his loaves and fishez

melanie: lololol probably 7:42
turning water into wine, etc

brooke: walking on water for exercise

melanie: grooming his beard
shopping for robes

brooke: buying new sandals

melanie: blessing people and shit

brooke: rising from the dead
frankincense and myrrh

melanie: getting nailed to a cross

brooke: wearing a crown of thornz

melanie: imprinting his face on a shroud somewhere

brooke: ok im out
you win
haha
that's the extent of what i learned in catholic school

melanie: i know, im kinda wracking my brain over here too
oh yeah
flipping tables in marketplaces
condemning fornicators

brooke: being xxxxxx' addiction!!!
(i winnnnn)
haha didn't you see that?
he posted something on facy
his top 5 addictions
and jesus was one of them
alongside starbucks iced lattes
i am not kidding

melanie: um that is so hilarious dude!
there was this girl i went to high school with named liz something
and she wore a silk baseball jacket that said
CARMEN ADDICTED TO JESUS WORLD TOUR 1993

brooke: was it serious or ironical?

melanie: pam and i would crack up about it all the time
she really was addicted to jesus dude!
he was like her meth
she couldnt get enough
"i lost me to jesus"